Thursday, July 16, 2015

Confessions of an Envious Mum

If you like school holidays, I envy you.
If you like school holidays, I don't understand you.
If you like school holidays, I'd gladly swap with you.

But alas, the latter isn't possible. So I better leave all my lack of understanding and wishful thinking aside, and get on with reality. Which is, I DON'T LIKE SCHOOL HOLIDAYS. There, I've said it. In fact, I don't like weekends either. Every Friday I hear my husband say, "yay! it's the weekend!". My heart just plummets and inside I think "shit, it's the weekend". I know it's very un-PC to be admitting this, but it's the truth. Weekends and school holidays, all our routines and little habits go out the window, and my introverted-people-loving-self (I know this may not make sense) is left with two kids under 6 who squabble squabble squabble, need me most of the time, and suck all energy out of me.

Please understand. I LOVE MY KIDS! I really do. I WANTED KIDS. I really did. But I just don't like being with them for more than a few hours at a time without a break. Yeah yeah, I know, one day I'll look back with nostalgia, bla bla bla. Maybe I will. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll relish the "kids are older" stage a lot more than I can relish the "my kids are little and needy" stage. Who knows?

In the meantime, if you like the school holidays, I envy you. A lot. I don't know why, but despite having things organized, I found these winter holidays particularly hard. Into the first week, I asked some of you for some tips on a Mummy Facebook page and I got some good ideas:

Okay, so if you're like me, you look at the lists above and freak out thinking, "eeeeek, I can't do all that". Believe me, it's not about doing all that. It's about having ideas ready so that you can pick and choose depending on:
a) your mood
b) your kid(s)' mood(s)
c) everyone's energy levels
d) your budget.

Another great idea is to

So with all this information under my belt, I went about making lists and picking ideas from it. The kids still squabbled. They still needed attention. But at least I didn't feel like a blank page in desperate need of ideas. We did have some fun, and there were some quiet moments:

Fun in the snow (sides), and teaching my daughter how to make short crust pastry (centre)

Encouraging Daddy on the football field, drawing,
playing with Master J's new wooden parking, reading books

Also, for your own sanity, I strongly encourage you to take some time for yourself, even if it's just 15 minutes at a time! I had a few occasions to escape over the past two weeks, which were very precious moments and were made possible thanks to a few angels in my life:

A walk on my own in the sun, coffee and soup in a cafe, admiring nature

So there you have them, my lessons learned over the winter holidays 2015. Of course, if you are the kind of Mum who loves the school holidays, you probably don't need all these ideas. You come up with them naturally, or you don't need a plan. You just enjoy hanging out with your kids for two weeks. I am in awe of you. But I am also in awe of Mums like me, who find it hard, but who get through it.

Kia kaha! Be strong!

Bloggers love comments. So if you have any ideas to add to my lists, please do share them. The more the better for the next holidays! Thank you!

In this series, you can also read:

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  1. Great stuff, Ann - this is an excellent post! Well done on not just surviving but thriving through the holidays :) xx thaliakr

    1. Thank you Thalia, I appreciate the feedback. Bring on Monday! ;-)

  2. Found you via facebook :) How much do I love this post! I don't relish the school holidays either. I wrote a blog post on recently about trying (key word: trying!) to embrace the holidays, because I was so unwell last year that my family had to care for my children. But it certainly doesn't come naturally to me and I appreciate you saying what so many mums are thinking.

    1. Thank you! I'll go over and check out your blog now. I love just being honest on here. I figure if only 1 another Mum is encouraged or feels less alone by reading my blog, then it's all worth it!

  3. Well done on surviving the holidays! Our boy is a bit older (12) and is an only child so no squabbling (phew). At the start of the break we did make a list of things we wanted to do together over the holidays - it was a great way to stop any "I'm bored" whinging and help avoid the PlayStation!

    1. Thank you Meagan. Well done to you too! I think having a plan or ideas is always a good idea. Helps feels more empowered.

  4. You've just given me an idea for the school holidays! I'll give my kids a designated amount of money (not too much!) so we can go to an ok shop and choose either clothes, toys, or books...on a budget of course! I love your 'star of the day' idea. I'll definitely use that! My kids often have silly fights. I have five'll stop the competitiveness between some of them, ha!

    1. That's great Cathy! Two great ideas. I hope the holidays go well for you :-).

    2. That's great Cathy! Two great ideas. I hope the holidays go well for you :-).